A few months ago, I posted about one of the three questions to avoid asking in a meeting. That question was, “Does anyone have any questions?”

Today let’s look at the second of those questions: “Does everyone understand this?”

WHAT’S THE ISSUE?

Such questions are unproductive for several reasons. For starters, when was the last time you heard, “No, I didn’t understand it,” in response? Have you ever?

Think about why people almost always answer “yes.” First, people don’t want to look poorly in front of their peers. They don’t want to appear struggling with a concept that no one else in the meeting seems to find problematic. Secondly, stating “no” might raise questions about your level of team support. All the other heads in the room are nodding yes, and going against that unanimity makes one look like they’re not a good team player. Another reason you will likely get a room full of agreement is simple politeness. Consider how similar “Does everyone understand this?” and “Doesn’t my baby look cute?” are. (This can be a huge issue when working with different cultures.) And then there are the people who say yes just to get to the next item on the agenda. The yes response does the work of moving the conversation onward.

Finally, even if everyone in the room answered yes because they believed they understood the topic (that is, none of the above drivers were in play), you still have no idea of how any of them understood it. Each person has a unique lens through which they process information. We each interpret information in through their lens of prior knowledge and past experiences. So, even if everyone understands the information, some will interpret it in terms of new possibilities while others will view it as “Oh no, here we go again.” And isn’t getting at the individual interpretations really more valuable than asking the closed question?

WHAT’S THE BETTER QUESTION?

Ask the disconfirming question with questions such as “What points don’t make sense for you?” or “What did I cover too quickly?” Then conduct an Order-of-Go to make sure you hear from each person. Questions that would further illuminate their mean-making processes would include: “As you think about what was presented, what was a key takeaway for you?” or “Based on what we just covered, what do you see we will be doing differently?” Both questions direct the listener’s brain to think in the more complex cognitive domains of analysis and application. The latter question also inserts the thought of “we will be doing something differently,” something that you may be hoping is a key takeaway for those listening to your presentation.

WHAT’S THE TAKEAWAY?

Words matter. Question structures matter. They matter because they direct people where and how to think. Certain words and questions are hearable as you really aren’t looking for a response. If you are a leader who often laments you don’t get people’s honest feedback, examine and reconsider the questions you are asking.

If you are interested in learning more about asking better questions, check out my book Asking is Better Than Telling or add your name to the I’m Interested list for attending my Ask the Better Question workshop.